Back to Work: Bittersweet Beginnings

The end of maternity leave is a strange mix of pride, excitement, and heartache. On one hand, I’m ready to dive back into my career, to re-engage my brain in new ways but then there is Henry. It is hard – really, really hard— to leave my baby bear after months of building a beautiful rhythm together.

Our days at home had a gentle structure that quickly became second nature: weekly swim lessons where Henry would splash and giggle, casual Target runs where we’d wander the aisles together, and slow afternoons full of tummy time, cuddles, and peek-a-boo. I’ve loved every moment of watching Henry’s personality emerge—the curious glances, the squeals of excitement, the stubborn determination when he tries something new. Now, I can’t help but think of the milestones I might miss: Henry’s first word, a new skill, or just one of those tiny, magical expressions that happen once and never quite the same again.

Even on work-from-home days, the challenge will be different. While I’ll treasure having mornings and evenings with Henry, it will be bittersweet knowing he’s just in the next room. I’ll hear his laughter while I’m on a video call call or catch a glimpse of him when I head to the kitchen to refill my water.  I know these small moments will tug at my heart—reminding me of the life happening just outside my office door.

The end of maternity leave is about balance, and it will take time to find our new normal. For now, I’m holding onto the fact that I’m not just leaving Henry—I’m showing him what it means to work hard and pursue passions. And the best way I am trying to rationalize it?  Every evening, when I walk back into his world, I’ll get to rediscover him all over again. I love you Henry James.  (And of course, my Lily Harper).